Funny Quotes

Well, I'm not afraid to say something if I think it's funny, even if it's harsh or racist.

I bought some batteries, but they weren't included.

From Kelsey, I have learned among many other things the value of turning on a dime and how you can have an extremely funny and extremely poignant moment with absolutely no separation in between... and sometimes in the same moment.

I don't care what the haters and naysayers say. If they make jokes about me, I'll laugh because they'll probably be funny.

I always approach comedy roles pretending they aren't funny.

Cleanliness becomes more important when godliness is unlikely.

When I tell people I'm a comedian they say, 'Oh, are you funny?' I say, 'No, it's not that kind of comedy.'

Whoever is my relative, I will not be nice to them.

Funny is when you're serious.

I had the classic 40 meltdown. I did. It's embarrassing. It was pretty funny. But then I recovered. To me, it was like a second adolescence. Hormonally, my body was changing, my mind was changing, and so my relationship to myself and the world around me came to this assault of finiteness.

I think movies glamorize violence, in the sense that they make it in a way that it's either cool or funny.

Billy Tauzin is one of the most interesting people in Washington. He is smart, funny, and interesting.

Miami Beach is where neon goes to die.

A mate of mine told me recently, 'It's the first time I've seen you work, Worthington.' I thought that was quite funny, but he was right.

That's why I like to get out there, and get people to see the other side of Mitt, and know us in a different reflection when you see the family and how funny he is with the boys and with the grandkids. And you know, just what a super guy he is. That's part of what I am doing, is letting people see the other side of Mitt.

Jim Carrey, a comic genius, has a harder time overcoming the public's desire for him to be funny simply because he's so good at it.

If God wanted us to bend over he'd put diamonds on the floor.

When I worked with Robin Williams, now there is improv! He is just as funny as you think he is. We did at least five or six takes of every scene, improvising every scene differently. He was a riot.

I never know when I am being funny, and the other way too. I don't think you can think about that. I don't think you can try to be funny. Some people are just funny.

And there's a visceral fun in watching Team America and making it, like taking a puppet and throwing it against the wall. Because it's not CG, there's something funny about it.

My Father had a profound influence on me. He was a lunatic.

Don't get me wrong, there are sometimes if I go and see a really funny comedy, that I wished I had smoked a joint. I'll be honest with you. That's the truth.

Books are funny little portable pieces of thought.

This is the great thing about Northern Ireland. I walk down the street and people stop me and say things like, 'I know you. You're that wee golfer, aren't you?' I say, 'Yeah, that's me.' They say, 'Keep it up, wee man.' It's very funny and that's why I want to stay here as long as possible.

If you're going to do something tonight that you'll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late.

I guess when I think about it, one of the things I like to dramatise, and what is sometimes funny, is someone coming unglued. I don't consider myself someone who is making the argument that I support these choices. I just think it can be funny.

I have a very low level of recognition, which is fine by me.

There's been a lot of coming home in the early mornings after funny nights out, having bizarre sandwiches in bed.

Very often, I don't make it through moments of recording because it is genuinely funny and absolutely ridiculous that a 60-year-old grown man is making these noises.

I love to go to Washington - if only to be near my money.