Funny Quotes

I found there was only one way to look thin: hang out with fat people.

Since she got a cause and stopped being funny. I think she's real funny, but lately it's all been hearts and flowers and tears and saving teenagers and creating a role model. And that ain't funny. No giggles there.

I read a lot of scripts that I just don't find very funny.

I've just seen really, really funny guys, and if I didn't know them, I wouldn't know they were funny from the television. I don't know what it does, it just sucks it away.

I find it so funny that people find me so interesting.

It's funny about men and women. Men pay in cash to get them and pay in cash to get rid of them. Women pay emotionally coming and going. Neither has it easy.

The funny thing is musicians often love to go to see visual art because you've got all these pictures to turn into metaphors.

I rant, therefore I am.

For years I used to bore my wife over lunch with stories about funny incidents.

It's funny, though, with films, because you can incorporate a variety of elements, and sometimes that can work for you and sometimes I think it can work against you.

But I think you can make fun of anything as long as it's funny enough.

I'm writing a book. I've got the page numbers done.

Sometimes in the most tragic situation, something just profoundly funny happens.

Chaos in the midst of chaos isn't funny, but chaos in the midst of order is.

In Italy, I had an Afro, and a lot of the kids came up and felt my hair. It really was funny. I wish I had understood Italian.

A vegetarian is a person who won't eat anything that can have children.

I just like the continue doing what I've been doing. A melange of funny, straight drama, television, movies, a little theater here and there wouldn't hurt. So if I can keep doing that, I'll be a very happy person.

I think serial monogamy says it all.

It's not about trying to be funny all the time. It's more of a document that hopefully is funny.

I think we're all good and bad, but good's not funny. Bad is funny. Suppress the good and let the bad out, and then you can be funny.

I really think that sex always looks kind of funny in a movie.

If you're going to tell people the truth, be funny or they'll kill you.

I think that came out of watching all those serious movies for all that time. If you watch a movie like Zero Hour, Sterling Hayden is pretty funny, and so are the guys in the cockpit.

The reason I turn down 99% of a hundred, I mean a thousand, scripts is because romantic comedies are often very romantic but seldom very funny.

If I have to lay an egg for my country, I'll do it.

Everything is so funny in the movie. The funniest thing about the movie is the transformations they were able to make with the characters.

We sit in a room for months trying to think of funny things.

I love New York. I was sad, depressed and incredibly moved by our fellow countrymen and what they've done. I wanted to give people a chance to see something funny, have a distraction.

Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday.

My job is summer camp. I come and talk and try to make a TV show funny.