Funny Quotes

It's a funny show. The characters are surprisingly likable, given how ugly they are. We've got this huge cast of characters that we can move around. And over the last few seasons, we've explored some of the secondary characters' personal lives a bit more.

Billy Crystal knows how to make people laugh. He's got 30 years on stage... there's no telling him what's funny.

I'm undaunted in my quest to amuse myself by constantly changing my hair.

I remember interviewing someone I actually felt bad for, and therefore didn't want to take an ironic stance against him. It actually turned out to be a really funny piece.

When I eventually met Mr. Right I had no idea that his first name was Always.

I wasn't very funny or flashy, I was kind of boring.

The people I grew up around who I really liked were quick on the draw. It always just wowed me. And my mum would make weird funny comments. I can see in myself her self-deprecating, hippie humour. I can't take myself too seriously.

You know, you can touch a stick of dynamite, but if you touch a venomous snake it'll turn around and bite you and kill you so fast it's not even funny.

A man doesn't know what he knows until he knows what he doesn't know.

I'd so much rather people think I was funny than pretty.

It is funny the two things most men are proudest of is the thing that any man can do and doing does in the same way, that is being drunk and being the father of their son.

From the first time I saw Sid Caesar be funny I knew that's what I had to do.

Being funny is one of my greatest strengths. I can make girls smile when they're down, and when they're having a good time, I can carry on the joke.

Funny things happen to you in movies for silly reasons.

I think there have always been funny women, from Carol Burnett to Joan Rivers. When the audience sees a woman, they innately know she's worked twice as hard to get there, she's had to prove that she can be the leader, first, and then be funny on top of it. She has to emit a confidence that she's in control.

It all started when my dog began getting free roll over minutes.

When something is truly funny, it's funny all the time.

When I first envisioned 'Funny Games' in the mid-1990s, it was my intention to have an American audience watch the movie. It is a reaction to a certain American cinema, its violence, its naivety, the way American cinema toys with human beings. In many American films, violence is made consumable.

I don't think the public is dying to see me necessarily be funny all the time.

All the candy corn that was ever made was made in 1911.

Memories are doing funny things to us.

There's something dangerous about what's funny. Jarring and disconcerting. There is a connection between funny and scary.

I tend to head for what's amusing because a lot of things aren't happy. But usually you can find a funny side to practically anything.

Guilt: the gift that keeps on giving.

Do you know anything that in all its innocence is more humiliating than the funny pages of a Sunday newspaper in America?

I was asked to act when I couldn't act. I was asked to sing 'Funny Face' when I couldn't sing, and dance with Fred Astaire when I couldn't dance - and do all kinds of things I wasn't prepared for. Then I tried like mad to cope with it.

You know, Stephen says, in the movies no one ever goes to the bathroom. They shave, they brush their teeth. He goes right at this sort of funny taboo we have about the bathroom, and he turned it into this nightmare, you know, your worst fear of what's in there.

People used to be funny about approaching me, but now they seem to think I'm as sane as anyone who's done what I've done in movies can be.

I don't need somebody behind a desk to tell me what a marketing survey says is funny. I got 3 million miles and 70,000 tickets sold, telling me that I know how to make people laugh.

Hemingway seems to be in a funny position. People nowadays can't identify with him closely as a member of their own generation, and he isn't yet historical.