Punch Quotes

All these fifty-year-old guys wearing baseball caps and shorts and acting like children. It winds me up. Men don't have to take responsibility anymore. Most of the guys I know would punch me on the nose for saying this, but maybe we do have to bring back conscription.

I realized that comedians of the day were operating on jokes and punch lines. The moment you say the punch line, the audience either laughs sincerely or they laugh automatically or they don't laugh. The thing that bothered me was that automatic laugh. I said, that's not real laughter.

I'm happy to report that everybody whose face I've wanted to punch on Earth has already been punched.

You don't argue with a four-year old about why he shouldn't eat candy for dinner. You don't punch a mentally handicapped guy even if he punches you first. And you don't argue when a women tells you she's only making 80 cents to your dollar. It's the path of least resistance. You save your energy for more important battles.

My father who in this case was an obsessive life-long storyteller, and by a very peculiar trick of my father's. My father would tell a very, very long story, and the punch line would be in Yiddish.

At least the Pilgrim Fathers used to shoot Indians: the Pilgrim Children merely punch time clocks.

Never go for the punch line. There might be something funnier on the way.

That's the most beautiful thing that I like about boxing: you can take a punch. The biggest thing about taking a punch is your ego reacts and there's no better spiritual lesson than trying to not pay attention to your ego's reaction.

Also, if you watch the film once, there are lots of things that you won't get because there are punch lines in the first act, the setup to which isn't until the second act.

The only dangerous scene is when James Cromwell put a stake in my chest. But other than that, it turned out to be quite a punch. I didn't think much of it.

Son, never throw a punch at a redwood.

I punch a lot of guys on set. It's much easier than in real life as your hands don't hurt afterwards. The key is that you miss.

Standing ovations have become far too commonplace. What we need are ovations where the audience members all punch and kick one another.

When I used to go into bars people would try and fight me. Women would punch me 10 years ago or put cigarettes out on my arm or my face. But it doesn't seem to happen any more. They show us a lot of love.

The knock-out punch is always the one you never see coming.

If you had a face like mine, you'd punch me right on the nose, and I'm just the fella to do it.

Getting hit motivates me. It makes me punish the guy more. A fighter takes a punch, hits back with three punches.

I'll think, If this is his first punch, how are the others gonna feel? That's the only fear I have for myself.

You never know why or when the next job is coming. I actually like that. It's kind of exciting. I don't punch in. I don't have a 9 to 5 job. When you do work you're lucky enough to go to interesting places and meet mostly interesting and talented people, so it's really a great job if you can work.

Mike Tyson would have been a good sparring partner for me and Muhammad Ali because Tyson was a fast fighter and he could punch and throw good combinations.

I don't really know what is shocking. When you tell the story of a man who is beheaded, you have to show how they cut off his head. If you don't, it's like telling a dirty joke and leaving out the punch line.

The devastating punch we took on September 11th still reverberates throughout American society.

I like all kinds of music. I listen to Abigail Washburn, the Punch Brothers, and Marc Johnson, the great clawhammer player. I also listen a lot to Sirius Radio, there's a lot of bluegrass there.

In the restaurant business, you never want to have enemies, whereas it seems that many politicians judge their success by how high their enemies are and whether they can show that they can hold their ground and give a punch for every punch they take.

I want Britain to punch its weight in the European Community.

There was only one punch. Tony Blair rang me and he said 'Are you OK?' and I said 'Yes', and he said 'Well, what happened?' and I said 'I was just carrying out your orders. You told us to connect with the electorate, so I did.

I think we're the only jokeless show on television. I mean really, we have no setups and no punch lines. It's not a joke show. There are funny lines and funny moments but again the comedy is born of the human experience and awkward pauses are a great part of what it is to be human.

If anybody dared say wrestling was fake, you'd punch 'em. And you never used the word show. If you used the word show it was an insult.

I went through a period where I just wanted to punch everybody. Since then, I've had a lot of therapy and I've figured a lot of things out.

We can also cut by heat - heat punch. And we also can cut by cold - extreme cold. When you cut with heat, it makes a mark. With cold, no mark. It depends on the fabric.