Quotes By Louis C. K.

Pushing the envelope' sort of implies that you're inside the envelope with everyone else, and you're trying to find the edges on the outsides.

I have a crazy amount of different jobs, so the way I manage that is to not do more than one at a time. It's like old computers that had small memory chips, they would do something called swapping, where they would fill the memory with one task, do it and get it out.

I thought about going to NYU film school - that was this ideal to me. But I didn't make any kind of grades in high school.

There's been a lot of simple vilification of right-wing people. It's really easy to say, 'Well, you're Christian, you're anti-this and that, and I hate you.' But to me, it's more interesting to say, 'What is this person like and how do they really think?'

If you're a cartoon character or most TV characters, sure, you'll fight, because the punches are juicy-sounding and they don't leave marks. But in real life, if somebody punches you in the eye, it doesn't make any noise and your eye is swollen for, like, six months. It's a nightmare to get punched in the eye.

To me the goal of comedy is to just laugh, which is a really high hearted thing, visceral connection and reaction.

I could never sit down and write jokes.

I do actually use a boxing trainer when I train for stand-up.

I'm bored' is a useless thing to say. You live in a great, big, vast world that you've seen none percent of.

I'm enjoying the work while I get it right now.

I don't believe in this idea of, 'That's hate speech, stop it.'

I grew up watching all these crazy movies, European movies and stuff, and I guess that I always laughed at things that were a little more offbeat.

It's easier to cancel a show if it's expensive.

There's two kinds of press that you get when you put out a TV show: The reviews, and the people that just decide what the reviews say.

Talking is always positive. That's why I talk too much.

Sometimes I try to take a nap before shows. That clears my head.

When I read things like the foundations of capitalism are shattering, I'm like, maybe we need that. Maybe we need some time where we're walking around with a donkey with pots clanging on the sides.

There's no real preparing at home for stand-up. You just go and you just do it.

I definitely look at my body and I go: 'Yuck.'

The thing is, comedy's gone in a weird direction. People are really into ironic comedy and fakeness and cleverness.

When you're young as a comic, you don't have a lot of leverage.

There's no such thing as a cheap laugh.

A very painful part of being a parent is having really negative feelings about your children when you love them so much.

I wish I could know everything ever, like that would be my wish - that's what I hope heaven is, that they tell you who shot JFK and all that stuff.

You can't direct without a good crew.

I don't think women are better than men, I think men are a lot worse than women.

I spend enough time onscreen looking hangdog and depressed.

I never viewed money as being 'my money' I always saw it as 'the money.' It's a resource. If it pools up around me then it needs to be flushed back out into the system.

It's kind of awkward to eat alone in a restaurant because everybody's looking at me.

When I am in a hotel, and I turn off the lights and the TV, I just freak out. I turn the TV back on and don't get any sleep.