Quotes By Trey Parker

I would never kill somebody, unless they pissed me off.

I try not to tune in to politics until it's two or three months before the election. Till then, it's like watching preseason football.

If we have a great idea, we'll go, 'Oh, this could be a cool movie.' Or really for us, it's more like, 'Oh, this is a really bad idea. Let's do this. This seems really stupid.'

It's funny because I think a lot of it is simply... We've never considered ourselves satirists, but because we're on Comedy Central and because we're South Park on Comedy Central, we can do any topic we want.

When I was in sixth grade there was a talent show, and I wrote my first sketch, 'The Dentist.' I played the dentist, and I had my friend play a patient. It was sort of what can go wrong at the dentist, and I just remember I had lots of fake blood and everything.

I don't want to say never, but I hope I don't become that 'take me seriously now' guy.

I hate puppets so much.

It's this simple law, which every writer knows, of taking two opposites and putting them in a room together. I love anything with Cartman and Butters at the same time, it's great.

What we're always looking for is weird social issues and weird connections to make. Luckily for them, there's no shortage of material.

Bargaining makes you come up with the best ideas.

We created a brand for ourselves, so that now people can't get mad at what we do, because then they're just making of themselves.

Even from the very beginning, I didn't put any money in the stock market.

So we're considering doing a new Christmas album, because there's been Christmas episodes since then, and maybe finally do the version of "The Most Offensive Song Ever" with lyrics intact.

The story of Jesus makes no sense to me. God sent his only son. Why could God only have one son and why would he have to die? It's just bad writing, really. And it's really terrible in about the second act.

The problem is we moved to LA... The only way to be punk rock in L.A. is to be a Republican.

I was always a very happy, optimistic person.

There is nothing we can't do. So it's just the fact that we're doing topics like that that other people, especially network TV, won't touch, that we're satirists.

Hollywood views regular people as children, and they think they're the smart ones who need to tell the idiots out there how to be.

Most people I know are not hard-core religious people. They are what I would call 'lightly religious.' So I don't buy the notion that we can't laugh about religion in America.

Sean Penn's really the only one stupid enough to put anything down on paper.

In terms of the creative side of it, it's really been a thing where you come up with the funny stuff is usually at a bar or out talking to people or whatever.

I see Santa Claus and Joseph Smith and Luke Skywalker as the same person.

It's not like we have a formula, but I think one of the reasons this show has survived is that it has a big heart at its center. Other cartoon shows have people crap on each other and make racist jokes. But I don't think people tune in for that. I just don't think a show lasts for 10 years without a heart.

Jerry Bruckheimer creates comedy, he just doesn't realize because he's a turd.

We're the guys who, if someone says you really shouldn't do an episode making fun of Scientologists, we say, 'Whatever.' Someone says, 'They might come try to burn your house down,' we say, 'We'll just get another one.'

I find Mormons adorable.

I spend shockingly little time thinking about real-world stuff.

You know, and it really doesn't have a lot to do with the movie. That's the trick to doing a good musical is that, if you take that music number out, there's less to the movie there. You would miss it.