Quotes By Trey Parker

People have a lot of different beliefs, and at the end of the day, we all have deeply held beliefs that probably don't make sense to anyone else.

When someone goes, 'Oh, this group is really pissed off at what you said,' there's not a piece of my body that goes, 'Sweet!' That means I did it wrong. I'm just trying to make people laugh.

Once you have kids, you think like a parent. You get a lot more protective.

It's been a fascinating thing because we didn't really know how to write when we started South Park at all. It's been like, we've just sort of grown up a bit and it's amazing to just see how, if you take Butters and Cartman and put them in any scene, it works.

Saying goodbye doesn't mean anything. It's the time we spent together that matters, not how we left it.

I would let my kids watch this stuff way before I'd let them watch something like 'Full House' that I think would make them stupid.

I have no desire to ever talk to Sean Penn.

I bought a house for my mom, I bought a house for my dad, I bought a house for my sister.

I got into this little habit of architecture and building. I designed a house in Colorado and one in Hawaii. The idea is supposed to be build and sell - but then I can never bring myself to sell them.

The only way to be punk rock in L.A. is to be a Republican.

You don't need missionaries in Colorado; you got Colorado.

Careful?! Was my mother careful when she stabbed me in the heart with a coat hanger while I was still in womb?

I would never kill somebody, unless they pissed me off.

I try not to tune in to politics until it's two or three months before the election. Till then, it's like watching preseason football.

It's funny because I think a lot of it is simply... We've never considered ourselves satirists, but because we're on Comedy Central and because we're South Park on Comedy Central, we can do any topic we want.

If we have a great idea, we'll go, 'Oh, this could be a cool movie.' Or really for us, it's more like, 'Oh, this is a really bad idea. Let's do this. This seems really stupid.'

I don't want to say never, but I hope I don't become that 'take me seriously now' guy.

When I was in sixth grade there was a talent show, and I wrote my first sketch, 'The Dentist.' I played the dentist, and I had my friend play a patient. It was sort of what can go wrong at the dentist, and I just remember I had lots of fake blood and everything.

I hate puppets so much.

It's this simple law, which every writer knows, of taking two opposites and putting them in a room together. I love anything with Cartman and Butters at the same time, it's great.

Bargaining makes you come up with the best ideas.

What we're always looking for is weird social issues and weird connections to make. Luckily for them, there's no shortage of material.

We created a brand for ourselves, so that now people can't get mad at what we do, because then they're just making of themselves.

Even from the very beginning, I didn't put any money in the stock market.

So we're considering doing a new Christmas album, because there's been Christmas episodes since then, and maybe finally do the version of "The Most Offensive Song Ever" with lyrics intact.

The story of Jesus makes no sense to me. God sent his only son. Why could God only have one son and why would he have to die? It's just bad writing, really. And it's really terrible in about the second act.

The problem is we moved to LA... The only way to be punk rock in L.A. is to be a Republican.

I was always a very happy, optimistic person.

There is nothing we can't do. So it's just the fact that we're doing topics like that that other people, especially network TV, won't touch, that we're satirists.

Hollywood views regular people as children, and they think they're the smart ones who need to tell the idiots out there how to be.