Quotes By Todd Barry

I had temping jobs also. I liked the flexibility. There was no asking for time off; you just didn't work.

I once sat next to Jim from Wild Kingdom on a flight from Atlanta. I find mentioning that opens a lot of doors.

There's people that are just in awe of what you do, and then there are people who just think it's garbage. And I think there are people who are just uncomfortable seeing someone have fun with their job.

I guess there seems to be clubs opening up again, which is strange.

I am the the type to have a personal experience with a celebrity, but I'm too classy to bring that up.

I don't really know much about pirates, or pirate culture. I'd be a contrarian pirate.

I like pens. My writing is so amazing there's never a need to erase.

Buddha, much like everyone else has good and bad days.

I mean, I've always had scattered interests, but I never went on stage to get an agent or anything like that.

I mean, I guess I realized subconsciously that this is what I should be doing before I realized it, consciously. Verbally, I don't think I had committed to it, even though I was driving everywhere, every night, just trying to get on stage.

I wasn't as nervous as I thought I would be when I started.

I'd rather send out a mass email then hang posters all over the place.

I basically did comedy there for about a year, and then moved to New York. If I had it to do over again, I would have booked myself on the road for at least a year.

Only lately, like within the last few years, have I had people actually do an impression of me to me, which weirds me out to think of what they have picked up on, without ever realizing it myself.

I mean, I guess I started during the comedy boom, so it was literally like, on Sunday you could decide you wanted to be a comic, and on Monday, you could be on stage.

You always think you're better than you are in the beginning.

People don't understand that that's really what it is. They're looking for a magic phone number or something. And to a certain extent, I understand that, because comedy is treated so much as a stepping stone by a lot of people.

I loved Australia. I was very successful there.

I would call it a comedy variety show. We have some people just doing straight standup. We usually try to have one musical act of sort. So its just people being funny in different ways, not just sketch, not just standup, not just characters, all of those things.

I liked the koala, wallaby, and I chilled with a kangaroo a bit. There was a wombat that I quite enjoyed also.

I must have done everything I had. You go through years where you go through everything you've ever written.

And the goal really is to make the audience laugh, to bring them some joy.

I had some friends that tried it down there, and I went to a couple of open mics, and I just kind of got this... this sick urge to try it instead of just watching it.

I was probably just trying to be Dennis Miller, but without the vocabulary to actually be Dennis Miller. I guess I was just less interesting than I am now, if I am interesting at all.

I'm traveling the world, ripping rooms apart with my stupendous comedy.

You come there and hang out and have a drink before the show and eat, so it's not that brutal. It's only $6.

I got access to a private tour of the zoo. I got to go in a cage with a koala, which I highly recommend.

I don't feel I'm even worthy of a normal amount of value.

I've never been a TV junkie. I remember watching Letterman way back when he had a morning show.

I don't know any astronauts. There are a lot of people who say they want to be comedians.