Quotes By Todd Barry

There seems to be more comedy for comedy's sake.

I will not be misquoted!

I do not like sports, unless you consider treating all humankind with love and respect a sport.

I want to release another CD this year, finish writing a screenplay, and make another short film.

I mean, I've had bartenders and waiters and waitresses make a comment about a joke of mine, like pointing out some sort of logic error or something that I've never even thought about, and they're right.

Well, I have since seen you at Tinkle. It's a comedy show started by David Cross, me and Jon Benjamin. It features a wide variety of acts for all tastes and seasons.

My sister sometimes does a Todd Barry tribute act.

It's cool to go to a place that has posters up and it's one night only. It feels more special.

Anyone who bombs is my friend.

I'm particularly proud of my reluctance to share my dreams with anyone.

I used to write things out beforehand. But sometimes it backfires.

Some venues are better run than others. Sometimes it's just maddening to deal with full dinners being served in front of your face. You can have a good or bad show anywhere.

If I'm at a party and someone puts on a Blues Brothers tape, I tend to go nuts.

If you see me at a restaurant, blow me a kiss, wave, blow me another kiss, then walk five steps backward.

It was actually 3 years between albums. That seems like a long time to me.

I had temping jobs also. I liked the flexibility. There was no asking for time off; you just didn't work.

I love chicken. I would eat chicken fingers on Thanksgiving if it were socially acceptable.

People in New York love having roof parties.

I once sat next to Jim from Wild Kingdom on a flight from Atlanta. I find mentioning that opens a lot of doors.

There's people that are just in awe of what you do, and then there are people who just think it's garbage. And I think there are people who are just uncomfortable seeing someone have fun with their job.

I guess there seems to be clubs opening up again, which is strange.

I don't really know much about pirates, or pirate culture. I'd be a contrarian pirate.

Buddha, much like everyone else has good and bad days.

I am the the type to have a personal experience with a celebrity, but I'm too classy to bring that up.

I like pens. My writing is so amazing there's never a need to erase.

I mean, I guess I realized subconsciously that this is what I should be doing before I realized it, consciously. Verbally, I don't think I had committed to it, even though I was driving everywhere, every night, just trying to get on stage.

I wasn't as nervous as I thought I would be when I started.

I mean, I've always had scattered interests, but I never went on stage to get an agent or anything like that.

I'd rather send out a mass email then hang posters all over the place.

You always think you're better than you are in the beginning.