Quotes By Janeane Garofalo

I do not enjoy when people don't like me.

Let's be very honest about what this is about. It's not about bashing Democrats, it's not about taxes, they have no idea what the Boston tea party was about, they don't know their history at all. This is about hating a black man in the White House. This is racism straight up.

It's been hard in entertainment as a 45-year-old woman to find jobs. They get fewer and far between if you're older, unless you're one of the few lucky ones who work constantly, like Meryl Streep.

I guess I just prefer to see the dark side of things. The glass is always half empty. And cracked. And I just cut my lip on it. And chipped a tooth.

You know, there's nothing more interesting than seeing a bunch of racists become confused and angry at a speech they're not quite certain what he's saying.

I'm grateful for any opportunity to act.

Is being an idiot like being high all the time?

Men are allowed to age. Men are allowed to gain weight. Men are allowed to be quirky looking.

I don't understand why, in entertainment, the hours are as long as they are. It seems like everything takes forever, and no one can tell you why exactly.

The term 'celebrity' makes my skin crawl.

I guess I just prefer to see the dark side of things.

When I see the American flag, I go, 'Oh my God, you're insulting me.'

I don't think Hollywood was trying to do anything with me. In fact, they lost interest pretty quick. I think I got lucky, briefly, in the '90s, and it just so happened that those movies were the opportunities that came my way. Then it just kind of stopped.

For my stand-up, I always have my notebook with me and if something strikes me, I'll write it down.

The world would be better off with multiple superpowers. When Communist USSR was a superpower, the world was better off.

I absolutely realize that a celebrity spokesperson is not ideal.

I don't have a good work ethic. I have a real casual relationship with hours.

I actually was class clown, but I don't know how that happened because I've never been considered an outwardly funny person.

I would say just in general, in life, I'm more willing to be animated as a person, and so obviously onstage as well.

I think I failed miserably on NewsRadio. I was very nervous because of the caliber of the cast - especially Dave Foley - so I think I did a terrible job.

Tina Fey is part of a generation of women who have changed the face of comedy at 'Second City,' 'SNL,' in sitcoms and in film.

I would prefer to be well-liked in any and all situations.

To me, there is no greater act of courage than being the one who kisses first.

I say at this point, for different reasons, Bush and Hussein are both very threatening to world peace and to deny that is to be incredibly naive.

I'm not a disciplined writer.

Here's what the right-wing has in, there's no shortage of the natural resources of ignorance, apathy, hate, fear. As long as those things are in the collective conscious and unconscious, the Republicans will have some votes.

Also, as I've gotten older and more mature, I've become much more comfortable in my own skin. After 25 years of doing stand-up, that's reflected onstage.

Iraq is a manufactured conflict for the sake of geopolitical dominance in the area.

I actually was class clown, but I don't know how that happened because I've never been considered an outwardly funny person-as the people in this room will attest.

You know, I've had Botox. The woman who does it is very good, obviously. Very conservative.