Quotes By Kin Hubbard

A bee is never as busy as it seems; it's just that it can't buzz any slower.

There is nothing so aggravating as a fresh boy who is too old to ignore and too young to kick.

If you haven't seen your wife smile at a traffic cop, you haven't seen her smile her prettiest.

A lot of Thanksgiving days have been ruined by not carving the turkey in the kitchen.

Nobody kicks on being interrupted if it's by applause.

The safe way to double your money is to fold it over once and put it in your pocket.

Live so that you can at least get the benefit of the doubt.

If some people didn't tell you, you'd never know they'd been away on a vacation.

Nobody ever grew despondent looking for trouble.

Fun is like life insurance; the older you get, the more it costs.

Honesty pays, but it doesn't seem to pay enough to suit some people.

An optimist is a fellow who believes what's going to be will be postponed.

There are two ways to handle a woman, and nobody knows either of them.

Nobody ever forgets where he buried the hatchet.

No one can feel as helpless as the owner of a sick goldfish.

Nobody can be as agreeable as an uninvited guest.

Bargain... anything a customer thinks a store is losing money on.

Of all the home remedies, a good wife is best.

It's what a fellow thinks he knows that hurts him.

Some folks can look so busy doing nothing that they seem indispensable.

Next to a circus there ain't nothing that packs up and tears out faster than the Christmas spirit.

There is no failure except in no longer trying. There is no defeat except from within, no really insurmountable barrier save our own inherent weakness of purpose.

A loafer always has the correct time.

Being an optimist after you've got everything you want doesn't count.

It's the good loser who finally loses out.

It's going to be fun to watch and see how long the meek can keep the earth once they inherit it.

Classical music is the kind we keep thinking will turn into a tune.

Men are not punished for their sins, but by them.

The hardest thing is to take less when you can get more.

If there's anything a public servant hates to do it's something for the public.