Quotes By John Mortimer

There is no pleasure worth forgoing just for an extra three years in the geriatric ward.

All the flower children were as alike as a congress of accountants and about as interesting.

The only rule I have found to have any validity in writing is not to bore yourself.

I suppose that writers should, in a way, feel flattered by the censorship laws. They show a primitive fear and dread at the fearful magic of print.

No brilliance is needed in the law. Nothing but common sense, and relatively clean finger nails.

To escape jury duty in England, wear a bowler hat and carry a copy of the Daily telegraph.

The shelf life of the modern hardback writer is somewhere between the milk and the yogurt.

The freedom to make a fortune on the stock exchange has been made to sound more alluring than freedom of speech.

The worst fault of the working classes is telling their children they're not going to succeed.

There is always time for failure.

I refuse to spend my life worrying about what I eat. There is no pleasure worth forgoing just for an extra three years in the geriatric ward.

Farce is tragedy played at a thousand revolutions per minute.