Mayonnaise Quotes

Europe's the mayonnaise, but America supplies the good old lobster.

Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.

I just want to tell you what it's like not to have Planned Parenthood... you have to give your kids Ramen noodles at the end of the month to fill up their little bellies so they won't cry. You have to give them mayonnaise sandwiches. They get very few fruits and vegetables because they're expensive.

Gentiles are people who eat mayonnaise for no reason.

One of my favorite things is mayonnaise and I have to tell you that. I love mayonnaise, but I don't eat it any more. If I do I put light mayonnaise on it, which I know is still not good but it's a lot better than the other one and I don't eat it that much.